The present invention relates to stable, aqueous fabric softening compositions, fabric softening methods and articles of manufacture that use such fabric softening compositions comprising preferred polyalkyleneoxy polysiloxanes selected from the group consisting of polyethyleneoxy polysiloxane, polyethyleneoxy/polypropyleneoxy polysiloxanes, and mixtures thereof. The composition is preferably applied as small particle size droplets, especially from spray containers. The present invention also relates to a method of identifying, selecting, and/or designing the preferred polyethyleneoxy polysiloxanes and/or polyethyleneoxy/polypropyleneoxy polysiloxanes that provide superior fabric softening performance in general, and especially for use in the fabric softening composition of the present invention.