An apparatus for achieving magnetically harnessed locomotion may include (1) a housing that at least partially houses a wheeled machine, (2) a plurality of wheels attached to a plurality of independently rotatable axles that are oriented substantially opposite one another along a plane of the wheeled machine, (3) a plurality of motors having shafts oriented substantially perpendicular to the independently rotatable axles, (4) at least one magnet positioned between the independently rotatable axles within the housing such that a magnetic force of the magnet (A) pulls the independently rotatable axles toward an inward point of the wheeled machine and (B) causes the wheels attached to the independently rotatable axles to press against the shafts of the motors. Various other apparatuses, systems, and methods are also disclosed.