Data storage reliability is maintained in a write-back distributed data storage system including multiple nodes, each node comprising a processor and an array of failure independent data storage devices. Information is stored as a set of stripes, each stripe including a collection of multiple data strips and associated parity strips, the stripes distributed across multiple corresponding primary data nodes and multiple corresponding parity nodes. A primary data node maintains the data strip holding a first copy of data, and each parity node maintains a parity strip holding a parity for the multiple data strips. A read-modify-write parity update protocol is performed for maintaining parity coherency, the primary data node driving parity coherency with its corresponding parity nodes, independently of other data nodes, in order to keep its relevant parity strips coherent.