The invention discloses a method for controlling the expansion and contraction of a suspension arm and the winding and paying off of a winch wire rope. The method comprises the following steps: detecting speed parameters of extending or contracting of the suspension arm and winding or paying off of the winch wire rope in a certain operating state; and calculating the extending or contracting speed V1 of the suspension arm and the winding or paying off speed V2 of the winch wire rope according to the speed parameters respectively, judging whether V1 equals to V2 or not, and if not, sending a control instruction for adjusting a power component of the suspension arm or the winch to ensure that V1 equals to V2. The method has the advantages that the expansion or contraction of the suspension arm and the winding or paying off of the winch wire rope can be controlled synchronously, and the moving speeds of the suspension arm and the winch wire rope can be detected in a real time manner, so that the control is more accurate; the degree of automation is higher; complex operation of the suspension arm and the winch wire rope in the prior art is greatly simplified; the operation is simple and reliable; and the working performance of a crane is greatly improved. Moreover, the invention further discloses a control system and the crane adopting the control method.